ADVERTISING SPACE FOR SALE ON JERSEY FLAG

A GROUP of Jersey flag enthusiasts are reportedly horrified to have learnt that the States are intent on selling advertising space on the Island flag to local and national companies.

A competitive pricing scheme will see a yearly rental of £100,000 for a full quadrant of the flag, £50,000 for half a quadrant and £10,000 for the space on the back. [Is this right? – Ed]

A spokesperson from the Chief Minister’s office said

“Look at all that white space! The flag’s original designers must have known that one day there would be a lucrative opportunity for us to cream money off the back of the symbol of our Island’s independence.”

She also handed us a draft of how the 2011/2012 flag design may look:

 

A leading member of the Jersey Flag Group told us

“This is just one of the many sort of things we don’t approve of! In fact, we’ve drawn up quite a comprehensive guide to how the flag should look, its dimensions, days when it should be flown, days when it shouldn’t be flown…”

An extract from the 482 point guide is as follows:

‘The flag should never be flown if:

a) It is frayed

b) It is upside down

c) A member of the Royal Family is wearing yellow

d) The Bailiff’s trousers have caught fire

e) The Island is underwater

f) The leopards are facing away from the flagpole

g) The leopards are humping the flagpole

h) One of the leopards has run away

i) The second Thursday of the current month coincides with a full moon

j) …

The guide is also very clear on which other flags may NOT be flown in Jersey:



NO!

 NO!!!

 

DEFINITELY BLOODY NOT!!!